Which “Week” really lasts ten or eleven days. But in a college sports universe where the Big Ten has, what, fourteen schools, and the Big East has members residing in Milwaukee, Chicago, Omaha and Cincy, and the Big South really ain’t so big — Sorry, Longwood — there’s no harm no foul when it comes to nomenclature.
Whatever we call it, we know it to be a prelude to the upcoming Sunday a week, a holy day on the calender known as Selection, and the Madness of March which follows.
Despite a pall of inevitability that pervades the upcoming proceedings like some hoopsular vortex, they still have to play the games. Which means questions abound.
Here are many, if not all of them:
Is it real, or is it merkin? I am told that Joe Lunardi was so flummoxed by the reaction to his hairpiece, that he had a co-host pull it to confirm that the disarray atop his head is real hair. I am still of the strong opinion that He Who Invented Bracketology a/k/a He Who Becomes Irrelevant At 6:00 pm Selection Sunday is still a mop top. But, the question remains unanswered.
What did he know? Mike Krzysewski, come on down. Take a seat here next to our recently calibrated polygraph, we got a question for you about your most recent ex-Blue Devil.
What does Bobby Knight think of the Cats chances? Okay, it’s a trick question. I think I speak for all of us, when I advise we could care less what Knight thinks about UK. Or, for that matter, anything else.
Quién es más macho, MAC, MAAC o MEAC? Does chastened Stevie Mas have another run in him with his Jaspers? Will North Carolina Central’s Eagles roll into Dayton for a play in tilt, as the league rep, blasting through the conference tourney as unblemished as they did the regular season? If they earn a chance, can the Buffalo Bulls do better in the NCAAs, than the Buffalo Bills did in four straight Super Bowls?
Will those not so cuddly anymore Zags zig their way through the bracket to the last weekend of the season? Could Kyle Wiltjer really get a chance to show his new stuff against his old team? Peripheral question: Would we love to see a Gonzaga pas de deux with Kentucky at the Dance?
Whither Indiana? Or, should that more correctly read withering Indiana?
Is there a Shabazz in the house? Can another Where Did They Come From? win six straight for the second straight year?
If so, who is the player that can hoist his teammates on his back and carry them to One Shining Moment? Louisvillian/ Buckeye D’Angelo Russell? Cardinal Wayne Blackshear? Terp Melo Trimble? Bulldog Kellen Dunham? Gael Brad “Where’s” Waldow? Ute Delon Wright?
When did he know it? Step on up to the mic, Coach K, this nurse here has a hypodermic of truth serum, then we gotta question for you.
Will Jim Boeheim watch the tourney, or be hanging at some sandy beach with that lovely Lexingtonian he’s married to?
If Wichita State gets hosed, either on Selection Sunday, or by the zebras in the Round of 32, will the Koch Brothers simply buy the NCAA?
Didn’t Rick Barnes used to be a good coach? That was submitted by The Professor, ever inquisitve.
How has Kansas won every Big 12 title since James Naismith retired? And why does the league with a dozen in its title only have ten members?
Which State reaches the Summit? South Dakota State Jackrabbits or North Dakota State Bison?
Is IU’s AD really “bullish” on Tom Crean? Or, will the Hoosiers’ coach be roaming the sidelines next season in Ann Arbor with his brother in law?
Might U of L drop all the way to the 8 or 9 seed line? That was submitted by loyal reader, BlindLuck.
Which schools are the legitmate tourney darkhorses? Northern Iowa? West Virginia? Maryland? Baylor? Florida Gulf Coast? A directional school? A school that starts the tourney in Dayton?
Whatever happened to Andy Enfield? Did his Trojans really finish last in the PAC 12, a league that knows how to count? Is he really married to that hot gal?
Which schools make my Final Four Today? Must I answer that? This is about queries not answers? Okay, Kentucky, Villanova, West Virginia and Arizona.
— Seedy K