MMQB: Second Weekend Wackiness

passimagesI mean, come on, you can’t make these things up.

For the second week in a row, BYU’s Tanner “Book of Mormon” Mangum threw a last second TD for the Cougars, as they bested Boise State.

Kent State got a score from a coed. April Goss became just the second female to score in a college football game, kicking an extra point in her school’s 45-13 W over Delaware State.

Which doesn’t come close to the absurdity of the end of Florida’s 31-24 W over East Carolina. As ECU was driving with a chance to tie or go ahead, Pirates QB Blake Kemp fumbled at the Florida 25 yard line with :12 on the clock. Gator Alex McAlister recovered, picked it up and was headed to the endzone for a defensive tally.

But, at midfield, McAlister was caught and tackled by Jarrad Davis. Which was odd because Davis happens to also be a Florida Gator. Which seriously incomprehensible tactic he took, to “prevent a fumble.” Or, so he says.

 * * * * *

Matters were arguably more cockamamie in the high school ranks.

Under the Friday Night Lights up in the Keystone State, DuBois HS’s sophomore QB Matt Miller had a helluva night. He passed for 741 yards, and led his team to 90 points.

Which, one would suppose, would have been enough for the victory. Even were his school playing hoops. Except that foe Meadville scored 107. Led by running back Journey Brown, who ran for 722 yards, and reached the endzone for 10 TDs.

107-90. You can look it up.

After the game, RB Brown was quoted as saying, “I’m tired.”

Closer to home, my alma mammy, the ever hapless J.M. Atherton High School Rebels, spanked Fort Knox, 62-0. Which came just a week after the normally punchless Dundee Roaders scored 40 in a beatdown of Shawnee.

Could it get any curioser?

 * * * * *

Well, yes.

Perhaps the strangest circumstance of all, at least in Kentuckiana, is this set of numbers.

Kentucky: 2 wins, 0 losses.

Western Kentucky: 2 wins, 0 losses.

Indiana: 2 wins, 0 losses. Though one of the teams’ perfect record will end Saturday. They meet in Bloomington.

Louisville: 0 wins, 2 losses.

What kind of odds could you have gotten on that parlay?

 * * * * *

If at least one team from the MAC doesn’t upset a Big Ten squad every September, it sure seems like it.

Yesterday, it was Bowling Green over Maryland, 48-27.

But, the all of sudden vulnerable SEC also felt some small Midwestern school wrath. Toledo rocketed past Woooooo Pig Sooey in Little Rock, 16-12. Bret Bielema used to coach up north at Wisconsin. He should have had his Razorbacks ready.

And he should stop worrying about other school’s schedules, and worry about his own.

 * * * * *

How about that trio of endings in the early evening?

Notre Dame did what the Fighting Irish too often do, winning in the final seconds at UVa.

In a back and forth affair that was more exciting than well played, the lead changed hands five times in the fourth quarter of Washington State’s W over Rutgers. The Scarlet Knights had regained the lead with 1:31 on the clock, when Janarion Grant returned a punt 55 yards for a TD,1 giving Rutgers the advantage. Which it soon thereafter surrendered, when the Cougars tallied the winning score with :13 to play.

Minnesota scored a go ahead TD at Colorado State with :55 on the clock. Then gave up a tying FG with :00 to play. Then recovered a Ram fumble on the first play of OT, and kicked a FG that won it for the Golden Gophers.

 * * * * *

Tennessee coach Butch Jones was so pissed after his Volunteers blew a 17-0 lead at home to Boomer Sooner, losing to Ooooooooooooooooklahoma in OT, that he accosted a celebrating Sooner after the game, and gave the kid a lecture on acting appropriately.


 * * * * *

While former Longhorn coach Mack Brown is certainly a more welcome presence in the studio than his predecessor Lou Holtz, he’s awful when doing color. He adds nothing in the way of expertise and insight to the action, falling prey to coachspeak at every turn.

 * * * * *

During the first half of the Schnelly Bowl in Boca Raton, The Pipe’s former Fighting Owls sure seemed the equal of The Pipe’s former ‘Canes.

The U blasted ahead in the second half.

But, coach The U’s coach Al Golden is high up on the Dead Man Walking list.

 * * * * *

Golden may survive, but I know one coach I’m sure won’t be back next season.

I could read Steve Spurrier’s mind, while his Gamecocks were losing to Kentucky, giving the improving Wildcats their first road SEC W since ’09.

Here’s exactly what he was thinking: “I sure I wish I was at home, pulling out my golf togs to wear when teeing it up tomorrow morning at Augusta National.”

Which is exactly what he’ll be doing next year on this very same September Saturday.2

 * * * * *

Ole Miss has scored 149 points in its first two games. Which works out to 1.24 points per minute.

 * * * * *

In bracing, but hardly surprising news, the law of averages caught up with the kid this week. My prognosticatory prowess took a major hit. 5-0 in Week I. 1-4 in Week II.

But I’ll have more to say about that, in the next day or so, along with five sure winners ahead to get us back on track.

Stay tuned.

— Seedy K

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