It’s March, and I’m Just Mad about Madness

The bracket, thank you for your annual beneficence Naismithius, has arrived.

As usual, it is a veritable menagerie of creatures, strange and not so.

Bruins, Bison, Bulls, Bulldogs, Buckeyes, Bears, and Bearcats.

Once again, our memories short, we are compelled to inquire: What exactly is a Billiken?

Cavaliers and Monarchs.

Cyclones and Flames.

Anteaters and Ducks.

Sooners and Volunteers.

Gaels, Gators and Grizzlies.

Tigers and Wildcats and more Wildcats.

Since we know that Orangoutangs, none of which sadly shall be participating in the Dance, are skeptical of changes in their cages, there is another query soon to be answered.

With Carl Spackler on their side, will Louisville’s Cardinals eradicate those varmint Golden Gophers?

And, while we’re at it, will Rick the Elder escape from exile in Greece to watch Rick the Younger coach against their former school? I mean, it’s the kind of thing this father is prone to do.

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Which leads to this question since the ever dapper pater shan’t be coaching in the tournament, who shall be the most bespoke mentor on the bench?

The knee jerk answer would be Jay Wright. And the fellow who has worn the crown twice recently would be a legit response, but incorrect.

His suiting is nice, well fit, but lacks drape. (It’s true, so obsessive is this hoopaholic, I take note of such anecdotia.)

You want to see a guy who knows how to wear a suit, check out Yale Eli mentor James Jones. He shows white at the collar, suitable cuff and the man’s suiting has drape.

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Oh this meaningless silliness could go on forever. At least until First Four tip Tuesday evening.

But those of us who obsess about our madness called Madness oft wonder: Is there a way to make the tournament even more exciting?

Well, in ESPN the Magazine, there’s a suggestion that grabbed my attention.

“The Fixer” suggests this. After the 32 automatic qualifiers, the committee chooses just 28 at large schools they deem most worthy, totaling 60. Then they take the next 16 wannabes who are pared down to four with games on two days, and those survivors fill out the field of 64.

Yes, UNV Greensboro, this one’s for you.

But here’s the intriguing kicker: No seeds. The 64 are paired up by a blind draw. That’s right, Duke vs. Kentucky in the opening round perhaps. Georgia State, Abilene Christian, NC Central, and Northeastern in a pod of 4, survivor to the Sweet 16.

How wacky would that be?

Bring it on, if you must, naysayers. I love it.

 * * * * *

Oh my, could I prattle on enthusiastically about the days dead ahead.

Ja Morant vs. Markus Howard.

Rick Byrd vs. Fran Dunphy.

And the hope that in a couple of days, I’ll be in contact with the manager of the UC Irvine campus store, imploring him to overnight that Anteater gear.

But enough addled meanderings are enough.

Let’s get the party started.

— Seedy K

4 thoughts on “It’s March, and I’m Just Mad about Madness

    1. Not sure. They’re good. But . . . freshman guards. Could get trapped by Houston. Could make it to Final Four.

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