How appropriate is it that Mike Leach — Mike “Are his synapsis really connected?” Leach — is a perfect paradigm for College Football 2020.

One week his offense steamrolls the defending national champs for 17 TDs and 4,000 passing yards. Air raid on parade. Two weeks later, the only item in Mississippi State’s shopping cart while Krogering is a safety. Pearl Harbor.

One day, Dan Mullen’s calling for a packed house. The next day his program is shut down when 19 in the Gator pigskin family test positive.

It would be nice for your resident, relied-upon sage to advise he’s got a bead on what’s going on.

I haven’t a clue.

As my results continue to show. Last week, Texas and TCU, and especially U of L let me down. Clemson the Cats down the road came through.

2-3 keeps my head slightly above water at 17-15-2 for the campaign.

I trundle on:

Cincinnati @ Tulsa.  Philip Montgomery’s Golden Hurricane may be one of the surprise contingents of a season when nothing should really be a surprise. Especially after leaving Orlando with a W over vaunted Central Florida. A close L in the opener to Okie State is looking better by the week, given the success of the Cowboys. The Bearcats have taken care of biz so far. But the few times I’ve tuned in, QB Desmond Ridder has looked like anything but a guy ready to lead Cincy to glory. Tulsa surprises again.

Pittsburgh @ Miami.  Perhaps the Canes should stop worrying so much about the bling, and simply concentrate on continuing to progress as a football team. Manny Diaz’s charges were seriously spanked in Death Valley last weekend. How much will that debilitating L affect the team’s psyche? Meanwhile the Panthers started off righteously, winning their first three, before dropping a couple of one pointers in league play. They won’t come that close in Coral Gables. And Miami won’t give up jewelry.

Georgia @ Alabama.  Here’s one of the reasons why Nick Saban is the Jeff Bezos of college football. There’s a guy on his staff whose only job is to scout assistant coaches on other teams around the country, to know who should replace the next round of Bama assistants moving on. Speaking of which, none have ever defeated the Aflac spokesman. Is this the season? Is former Tide DC Kirby Smart gonna break the ice? Can the former walkon-led Bulldogs find Dreamland in Tuscaloosa? No.

Kentucky @ Tennessee.  The bad news: UK has only beaten the Vols twice since 1983. The good news: Those Ws came in the last nine seasons. Including three years ago in Lexington. Some things are the same as they ever was, including Rocky Top drowning out “On On U of K.” Is 2020 so wacked the Cats could break the norm? The upwardly mobile Vols were destroyed last week between the hedges. Will they bounce back? Yes. Some things are the same as they ever was.

Louisville @ Notre Dame.  It has been my policy only very rarley to pick against the Cardinals. Bad karma, and all that. The truth is that U of L’s chances of victory in South Bend are infinitesimal. But my new theory is that they shall increase if I pick Notre Dame to prevail. I pray I’m wrong when I go with the chalk. Fighting Irish.

—  c d kaplan