Seedy K’s Peerless Pigskin Prognostications: Week VIII

There’s no other way to say it.

This season is getting curioser and curioser by the week.

(OK, sure, there are other ways to say it, but I went with the words of Charles Ludwidge Dodgson.)

There was something dumbfoundingly Orwellian about Kentucky’s complete evisceration of Rocky Top. The Wildcats hadn’t won in Knoxville since Newspeak became Big Bro’s language of choice.

And here we are when it’s being spoken by more and more people, and UK turns the Orange over under sideways down.

I mean the next thing you know, the Big Ten schools will actually be playing football.

Oh yeah, they are going to start . . . when we are already in Week VIII.

Anyhow, that Kentucky upset was the only game I missed.

Miami bounced back from its Clemson debacle.

Saban proved, as he has done every single time the situation has presented itself, that he can beat his former assistants. Even if he spends game week CEOing from his den.

Notre Dame held off Louisville, though my Cards were game, and full of fight.

Tulsa woulda upended Cincy . . . if the game hadn’t been postponed. It was a DNP.

3-1-1 for the week raises my numbers to 20-16-3 for the season.

This weekend’s winners:

Iowa State @ Oklahoma State. In the topsy turvy B12, only the Cowboys remain undefeated. For clarification’s sake, I’m talking T. Boone Pickens’s Cowboys, not Jerry Jones’s Cowboys. Iowa State, after a surprising setback to the Ragin’ Cajuns on opening day, hasn’t lost in the league. No conference cupcakes either on that roster of vanquished. Okie State hasn’t played in a few weeks, giving the Mullet extra time to prepare his troops for the important clash. But Matt Campbell is every wag’s Next Great Coach. Plus his coif looks perfectly normal. Cyclones.

Georgia Southern @ Coastal Carolina. Knowing my affinity for offbeat mascots/ nicknames, Bookstore Billy called. “Have I got a nickname for you. At Jack Benny Jr. High in Waukegan, Illinois?” My guesses: “Rochesters,” and “Penny Pinchers.” Correct answer, and a truly cool moniker, “The 39ers.” Should you not get any of the references, ask your Aunt Martha. A cool mascot is why I have joined many, jumping on the bandwagon of the Coastal Carolina Chanticleers. No Little Red Roosters, they be borne of Chaucer. They also be 4-0 with a W over Kansas, and, more impressively, over Louisiana. Grayson McCall is a fast riser on the QB You Never Heard Of Who Will Be Playing On Sundays list. Georgia Southern’s not chopped liver, but I, for one, am not disregarding the Canterbury Tales.

Nebraska @ Ohio State. A friend was driving through Ohio in the spring of 2012, listening to sports talk radio. It was all Buckeye chatter, and the general belief was Urban Meyer would go undefeated in his debut campaign in Columbus. Which he did. There is no collegiate sports program with a fan base quite as obsessive, or obnoxious, as THE OSU’s. That includes you, BBN. How much did they want it on the banks of the Olentangy? Ryan Day and his staff are so intense, they moved out of their homes to lesson the chances of falling prey to the COVID. The Husker Nation is also pretty locked in, and Scott Frost turned whiner when it looked like his gang wouldn’t get to play, threatening to compete whether the B10 did or not. The reward: A trip on opening day to the Horseshoe. Where they have not a chance.

Kentucky @ Missouri. Terry Wilson is only the second UK QB ever to have career Ws over both Tennessee and Florida. The other one? Haven’t a clue. Bob Hardy? The Wildcats have beaten a 2-2 team, Tennessee. The Wildcats have lost to a 2-2 team, Auburn. The Wildcats have beaten a 1-3 team, Mississippi State. The Wildcats have lost to a 1-3 team, Ole Miss. Meanwhile, the Tigers beat LSU, and lost to the Vols and Crimson Tide. Which is to say, during this All SEC All the Time season, UK and Mizzou appear pretty evenly matched. Big Blue has won five in a row in this series. Will Kentucky make it a half dozen? I’m assuming their heads will still fit in their helmets after last week’s heady headturner in Knoxville, so, yeah, I guess, yes.

Florida State @ Louisville. The Seminole roster is chock full of former future Cardinal signal calling stars. Chubba Purdy. Jordan Travis. As predicticated here sometime back, one of them will be starting in Cardinal Stadium Saturday, since it has been obvious for years that James Blackman wasn’t going to be the guy to lead Florida State back to glory. It’ll be Travis this weekend. Big W last time out for FSU, besting overrated Carolina. Big Effort last time out for U of L, going facemask to facemask with the Fighting Irish in South Bend. For whom will the Mo continue to flow? The Good Guys.

— c d kaplan