Hoopaholics Gazette: Ever Rickdiculous

Former Louisville Cardinal coach Rick Pitino changed his hair color after taking the reins this season at St. John’s.

But his true colors bled out like a shvitzing Rudy Giuliani after the Johnnies dropped their 8th game in the last ten to Seton Hall. Blowing a 12 point halftime advantage in the process.

The Rick is an acknowledged good coach.

He is charismatic.

But, one guy’s opinion — mine — he is an insufferable egotist.

I’m grateful for the title he fashioned at U of L. And, as sad as I am about the aftermath the Cardinal program is still suffering, which harkens back to the Pitino era when it germinated, I am grateful he is not coaching my team.

So, yes, I couldn’t stop smiling this morning when I chased down the rabbit hole of reportage about his post game tirade last evening.

(For transparency’s sake, know that much, but not all, of the information contained herein has been culled from national new sources. I did do a smidge of research on my own.)

Pitino first torched his school’s facilities.

The Rick then threw his players under the bus.

Then took the wheel and drove back and forth over them.

Oh Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, you bemuse me so.

A sampling of his post L “observations”:

“Do we have shitty facilities? Yes we do. Having shitty facilities has nothing to do with not guarding.”

As for the player he recruited, after kicking 99 44/100% of last year’s team out the door, Coach Congeniality had this to say. Naming names. How sweet.

“Look: Joel [Soriano]’s slow laterally, he’s not fast on the court. Chris Ludlum is slow laterally, Sean Conway’s slow laterally. Brady [Dunlap]’s physically weak, Drissa [Traore] is slow laterally.”

“(We) lost this season the way we recruited.”

He said that the players don’t align with how he coaches.

Really, Rick, well then, my man, tell me who might be responsible for that?

Just asking for a curious hoopaholic.

All this disparaging from the fellow who rather infamously, when Celtics coach, traded first round pick and eventual five time NBA all-star Chauncy Billups after but 51 games in green.

So I checked to see how some of the fellows are faring, those who played at St. John’s last season and were kicked out the door by oh you know.

AJ Storr is leading scorer for Top 25 Wisconsin. 16.5 ppg. Wonder if he can move laterally?

David Jones is leading scorer for Memphis State. 22 ppg. Wonder if he can move laterally?

Posh Alexander is averaging 11 ppg at Butler. Also wondering how his lateral movement is?

O’Mar Stanley is putting up 12.8 ppg at Boise State. You know my questions about him.

Pitino’s exclamation point: This season is “the most unenjoyable experience of my lifetime.”

By the by, Mr. Rick Sir, that light brown hair dye is running down the lapel of your Brioni.

— c d kaplan


6 thoughts on “Hoopaholics Gazette: Ever Rickdiculous

  1. Thanks , I made a less astute reply on Twitter to his babble. If I was on that team after being humiliated by him, portal here I go . What a bullheaded , egotistical guy.

  2. Your UK fandom is showing through….still can’t forgive the Rick for coaching the Cards, huh?

    1. I still can’t forgive Pitino for his alleged coaching of the Celtics. Yes I live in Boston.

  3. As both a longtime Celtics and U of L fan transplanted many years ago to Boston from my hometown of Louisville, I love your take on despicable Rick.

  4. Couldn’t have said it better, Chuck, because if I were a player there I’d pretty much 4 letter him & wave buhbye

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