Suck on this, Greg Sankey.

There will be sixteen Round of 32 games this weekend.

Exactly half of the competing schools shall be double digit seeds.

Including Oakland — from Michigan Greg, not Cali — who beat your leagues most historical now hysterical program.

And one of them academic schools Yale, who upended Auburn, which I gots to mention, won your league’s tourney. Guess they care more about spring pigskin practice on the Plains.

Plus Grand Canyon, which is some sort of hybrid for profit, religious affiliated institution of higher learning with upper echelon level facilities and a rabid fan base. James Madison, named for Dolly’s hubby don’t ya know, which, by the by, has won more games this season than any team not named UConn.

Along with P4 late season overachievers Colorado, Oregon and surging NC State.

So, that’s a tally, Greg, of a #14, a #13, two #12s, three #11s, and a #10.

Greg, hear me now and believe me later, don’t fuck with the most perfect post season in sports. (Do not pardon my French.)

 * * * * *

Now the tension mounts for my particular readership.

Flav o’ Flav o’ The Month Dusty May is now available to be made an offer he can’t refuse to coach at some school or another looking for a coach. And a bunch of new players.

Because, after a dumbfounding interruption by CBS News at crunch time with the breaking news that the Princess of Wales has cancer (not to make light of that), Florida Atlantic was coming down to the wire in regulation against surging Northwestern.

Soon after, the Owls’ big Vladislov Goldin was at the line with :26 to play with FAU up two. He missed the front end. Northwestern drove it down and knotted the affair at 78 with :09 to play.

After which, the Florida Atlantic star Johnell Davis was — let’s be frank here — Too Damn Cool For School.

He could have driven on a wide open right side to the hoop, had plenty of time, and either gotten fouled or made a game winning deuce.

Instead he tom-tommed the ball beyond the arc and lofted an unanswered prayer at the buzzer.

Dude, make the play, for Schnell’s sake.

The Wildcats outpointed the losers by a dozen in OT.

Last year’s darling is this year’s one and done.

Josh Heird, the clock is a tickin’.

Of course, there’s always the nagging consideration: Was Dusty May a one hit wonder?

Who makes up these lists of possibilities for the U of L job anyway. One includes Jamie Dixon. Seriously? Somewhere else, the writer called Bob Huggins the leading candidate. Had to be AI.

Was Scott Drew really under consideration? Mick Cronin? (Josh, just say No to that one.)

I stand by my belief that only Josh Heird and his whisper counsel know he’s considering.

Pat Kelsey? Niko Medved? Josh Scherz? Jerome Tang? How about the other Drew, Bryce, who was stuck in an impossible situation where he underperformed at Vandy, which doesn’t seem to care.

I got no clue.

But I’m ready to find out.

 * * * * *

Meanwhile as dinners across the land were being savored, those in the homes of hoopaholics were getting cold in the serving dish.

Because Colorado/ Florida and Yale/ Auburn were playing tandem barn burners at supper time.

Honey, forget the brussel sprouts, get me some ice for my clicker finger, please.

The Buffs tallied with :02 left to conquer the Gators in 102-100 defensive struggle.

Meanwhile FLA’s SEC bro Auburn was crying in its beer down at Maury’s.

The Ivy League champs outscored the SEC champs by nine after intermission to spring the 13>4 upset, 78-76. The Tigers had several chances to knot it or win in the final six seconds.

None fell.

All together now . . . Awwwwwwwwww!!!

 * * * * *

Western Ky’s Hilltoppers made Uncle Ed Diddle proud . . . in the 1st.

They headed to the locker room, fans’ towels a wavin’ — up 43-36 over Marquette after a 24-8 run.

Then were outscored by 25 after halftime by the Warriors/ Golden Eagles.

 * * * * *

Every time I see one of those ridiculous interviews with coaches during first half timeouts, I wonder what Adolph Rupp or John Wooden or Hank Iba would have done with a mic stuck in their face during a game.

Of course, Jim Valvano would have loved it.

— c d kaplan